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Posted by Kimda on April 14th, 2008 @ 3:12pm
[ mood | empty ]

Sing me to sleep, sing me to sleep. I'm tired and I, I want to go to to bed. Sing me to sleep. Sing me to sleep. And then leave me alone...Don't try to wake me in the morning, 'cause I will be gone.

Don't feel bad for me, I want you to know...deep in the cell of my heart, I will feel so glad to go. Sing me to sleep, sing me to sleep. I don't want to wake up on my own anymore. Sing to me, sing to me. I don't want to wake up on my own anymore. Don't feel bad for me, I want you to know deep in the cell of my heart I really want to go.

There is another world, there is a better world...well, there must be. There must be. ...there must be.

Bye, bye

2 comments | reply | memories | edit

Posted by Kimda on March 17th, 2008 @ 8:38pm
[ mood | Thoughtful. ]

I don't really know where to start. It's been at least a month since I have updated.

I'm nineteen now. My grandfather passed away. Work is the same, family is the same, Nate is perfect. Friends are confusing. Crushes are even more confusing, and more trouble than they are worth.

I've been questioning the purpose of caring for so many people. I'm always told not to expect everything I give to come back to me; what if I'm not satisfied with that? What if I want both? Sometimes, on better or worse days, I want neither.

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Posted by Kimda on February 6th, 2008 @ 1:48pm

UGH. I have so many things to update about, it's absolutely insane.

First things first: I went to the Marilyn Manson concert in Philly at the Electric Factory on Sunday, January 27th. I went with Caroline and Luis. First that day we got together and got breakfast at Perkins which I didn't finish. Then we went over to the Beauty Depot so Caroline could get hair bleach and so I could get black hair dye. That's right, folks; back to black. Anyway, after we got the goods, we drove to Le Chateau Exotique in New Hope. We tried on a couple of outfits because we needed to look bitchin' for the concert. I ended up finding a faux-corset by Lip Service on sale for 90(!!!) dollars. It is SO HOT. It's over-bust and black with silver vertical pinstripes. We ended up heading back to my house to get ready for the concert- I dyed my hair black, Caroline didn't have time to bleach hers, but she wore these awesome latex mini stripper shorts over black and gray stockings. We got ourselves all dolled up and then got in the car to go over to Philly. We got slightly lost on the way there but eventually made it, safe and sound. We got to the concert and waited in line for about 20 minutes in the freezing cold. We got inside and bought some shirts and then got up to the stage and cemented our place in the crowd.

It took until 8:00 for the opening act to start. Their name is 'Ours' and they're New York-based. They were okay- not my style, but decent performers. They performed for maybe 30 minutes to an hour. Then when they were finished, this amazing curtain with two jagged M's fell in front of the stage while we waited for Manson to set up. It took about an hour and then the lights went out and behind the curtains we could see candles and Manson's figure with his arms out like Jesus on the crucifix. Everyone started screaming and then the curtain dropped and the show started. I was like, 30 feet from him the entire concert. I felt like I was going to lose my shit! Marilyn Manson has been my idol since I was in middle school and I'm not ashamed to admit that. He's such an interesting and talented person, not to mention incredibly intelligent, and now I see for certain that he is a fucking incredible performer.

I kept almost getting thrown in the mosh pit which was right next to me the entire time. I composed part of its wall. I ended up getting elbowed in the ribs, but it was okay. I was jumping up and down and screaming and sweating and I have never felt so amazing IN. MY. LIFE. Manson threw a water bottle into the crowd right in my direction. The people in front of me caught it but it burst all over me and I swore I'd never shower again. The show ended with this incredible finale of "AntiChrist Superstar" with this 7 foot podium that Manson stood atop and he lit a bible on fire, haha. I have never experienced something so amazing.

At the end of the night, we all ended up getting lost in Philly, and then getting lost on the way home, and then finally we ended up navigating home after panicking for a few hours. I was so exhausted and just wanted to go home and never forget which was probably the best night of my life.

Other than that, I've just been working my ass off. No school since I'm taking this semester off. I have my driver's test scheduled for the 13th and I have been practicing like the dickens. In other news, my friends and I got pulled over a few nights ago on Super bowl Sunday. My friend's car has a headlight out and he gave us a warning but we were freaking out the entire time. I have a lot of pictures I need to post. Unfortunately, there aren't any of me, Caroline, and Luis at the concert since we were all too excited to take pictures. I have a ton of my friends at a party that I didn't attend. It was all of my friends at our friend Robin's apartment, drinking. I'm not into alcohol so I skipped that but they had my camera hostage and took pictures of the occasion. I'll post them as soon as I find the time.

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Posted by Kimda on January 22nd, 2008 @ 11:36pm
SO, Holy fuck. Heath Ledger died.
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Posted by Kimda on January 21st, 2008 @ 4:53pm

I can't fucking handle this bullshit. I think I'm going to puke.

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Posted by Kimda on January 17th, 2008 @ 4:45pm

I don't really know what to do. I thought today was the last day to register for classes and apparently it was yesterday. I guess I won't be attending this semester? I don't know what my parents are going to think of that. It seems as though I'm living here on this earth just to waste away. It has been snowing all day and it doesn't seem like it has any desire to stop so a day with my friend Luis was thrown out the window. No one hangs out as much anymore because school is starting and everyone is gone. I miss Andrew so much- I know he probably just thinks I'm a fucking creep since I'm always saying how much I miss him...but he was the one person who really understood my jokes, my stupid sense of humor, and who I felt didn't really judge me at all. He was sort of my right-hand man. Nate and I just got in a fight.

I am all alone.

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Posted by Kimda on January 9th, 2008 @ 3:11pm

Tattoo Adventure "08Collapse )
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Posted by Kimda on January 4th, 2008 @ 12:52am

So. Holy shit. I'm getting my tattoo in two days and I'm scared out of my mind. I'm so excited and definitely not gonna back down but I'm starting to get really FREAKIN' worried about the pain. LKHFSKDJHFDS. EVERYONE WITH TATTOOS, CONVINCE ME IT'S NOT THAT BAD. Because it probably isn't but the anxiety is driving me crazy.

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Posted by Kimda on January 2nd, 2008 @ 12:47am

Have my tattoo date set for Saturday! It's at 6:30 pm. I'll probably stuff my face on Taco Bell before my appointment and bring some candy to keep my sugar up. Nate won't be able to go! :( :( :( I'm really upset. He will be at work. Perhaps I can persuade him to call out or ask off early...I really want him there. My friend Andrew will be taking me, though. He went with me when I originally tried to make my appointment but ended up needing to print my design first so I had to go back the next day. I hope more people can come with me so I'm not all like BLAGHHHH *squeezes Andrew's hand to death* because that would suck.

I had a pretty badass New Year's Eve...My Night.Collapse )

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Posted by Kimda on December 25th, 2007 @ 2:54pm

I am planning on using some of my Christmas money and paycheck to get my first tattoo asap. In case anyone is interested, I will be getting "fearlessness" written in Sanskrit on the top of my back, right below my neck. It has a pretty intense meaning to me, despite the fact that it might seem cliché, since I have been struggling with fear for my entire life. I've been conquering my anxiety disorder successfully for the past few years and I want to have something to really symbolize the courage I have been working up to make my life better.

For those of you with tattoos, I'd like any advice you can give me. I'd also like to know your opinion on the pain level for the area I am planning on tattooing. If you can, give me an idea of what to expect, how much I'll probably need to spend, etc. I'm going to be researching the best local place to go and setting up an appointment as soon as I get the chance.

Sadly, I'm scared shitless. I never used to be afraid of the pain associated with body-mods. I used to pierce my own body parts on a whim and never even thought of the pain. Of course, this was back before my medication and during the ole' self injury days, so maybe that had something to do with my lack of fear regarding pain.

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